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Lesson X
Part A | Part B | Part C | Part D
LESSON X
THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY
Part A
The family has been the basic unit of God’s creation from the
beginning. After He had created the world, plants and animals, God topped off His creation
by making man in His own image. Then out of man He created woman. God could have chosen to
create many human beings as He had apparently created many plants and animals, and then
set up a human government as His basic unit. But He did not do so. Rather, He chose to
create the family as the basic social unit and the family unit became the basis for His
relationship with man. This is most clearly evident in the Jewish family, although we see
it in the Old Testament even before God called out the children of Israel to be His
special people. God spoke to Adam’s family through Adam, and He spoke to each
succeeding generation through the head of the family. That is why these men are still
known as the Patriarchs. We see how God spoke to Noah and, through Noah saved Noah’s
whole Family. When He called Abraham, however, the line of family relationship became
especially evident. God made a covenant with Abraham that applied to his family and their
descendants. God even began to refer to Himself as the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob,
identifying Himself with this growing family. Then as God blessed Jacob with twelve sons
and changed Jacob’s name to Israel, God’s people became known as the
"Children of Israel." By the time Moses was born 400 years later the closeness
of the Hebrew family was evident in the risks his parents took to preserve his life. When
Moses answered God’s call to lead his people out of Egypt his brother Aaron, sister
Miriam and even his father-in-law Jethro were used of God to assist Him.
In the wilderness God gave Moses the law, one section of which the Jews
call the "Shemah." (Deut. 6:3-9; 11:18-21) This section speaks specifically of
the family and its responsibilities. It includes a declaration of who God is, the
commandment to love the Lord with all the heart rather than just superficially, the
command to teach these truths diligently to the children, and to reinforce the teaching
with continuous reminders. The family was to talk of these matters frequently, post
reminders of them upon the walls and wear them on their bodies. The Word of the Lord was
to be continually in their midst.
The Jewish Feasts were also intended to strengthen the family and draw
the family to God as a worshipping unit. The Passover particularly held up the father as
the spiritual head of the family. Each father was strictly commanded to pass on this
observance to the eldest son. Through out the long history of Israel, from the tabernacle
to the temple to the synagogue, the family has survived as the basic unit of worship and
loyalty. In many communities around the world where there were not enough Jews to build a
synagogue, or where anti-Semites was too strong for them to worship publicly, the Jewish
family survived and Judaism survived.
Suggested Discussion Question:
The Christian family can learn from the Jewish example. How frequently
do you remind your children of the Lord and His claim on their lives? How do you do this?
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Part B
The New Testament teaching regarding the family absorbs the Old
Testament teaching and adds further details. The husband and wife become one, with the
husband the head of the family as Christ is of the Church (Eph. 5:21-23). Children are to
be brought up "in the training and instruction of the Lord" (Eph. 6:1-4; Col.
3:20-21). God not only has established the family, but He has given His laws to protect
it. Of the ten commandments, there are six that deal with interpersonal relationships. Of
these six, three are intended to protect the family: [a ] "Honor your rather and your
mother," [c] "You shall not commit adultery," and [c] "You shall not
covet your neighbor's wife. . ." ( Ex. 20:7-17).
First God established His plan for the family’s organization, then
He protected it from being undermined from within, and then protected it from attacks from
without. Jesus extended this protection by enlarging upon the understanding of adultery
(Mt. 5:27-28) and forbidding divorce except in the case of adultery (Mt. 5:32). Jesus
plainly taught that a strong family unit is God’s best for mankind. This is why Paul
gives extensive teaching on marriage and the family in his letters. He makes a very strong
statement in his letter to Timothy that a man who does not take care of his own family is
worse than an unbeliever (I Tim. 5:8).
This high standard of family loyalty puts the Christian family on a
collision course with many modern political systems. These political systems undermine the
family unit by setting the state over parental authority. They do this by removing
children from their parents’ care with only minor justification, attempting to usurp
family responsibilities in the teaching of moral values, providing government
"day-care centers" to replace parental upbringing, and generally downgrading the
importance of the home.
In some totalitarian countries the attack upon the family is even more
aggressive. The authorities in such countries cut to a minimum the amount of time the
family can he together. Both parents are required to work long hours outside the home,
while the children are "cared for" by the slate. What little time the parents
might spend with the children is often consumed by attendance at required political
meetings, or waiting in long lines to buy scarce basic commodities. During the time that
the children are in the care of the state they are being intensively indoctrinated.
Teachings are often specifically anti-Christian and subtly designed to destroy the family
unit.
One aspect of their teaching that is well known is often referred to as
"children spying upon their families." This is a poor term, because it implies
that the children are aware that they are doing something against their parents.
Generally, this is not the case. They are supposedly being taught to be
"observant" and are rewarded for having noticed anything "unusual."
For most children it is just a game, but it is an important source of information to the
authorities in many countries. Following the fall of Vietnam, for example, many attempting
to escape were killed or captured because of tips turned in by children under 12
years-of-age! Christians inside of the People’s Republic of China tell us that one of
the most serious problems a family faces is the question of when to let a small child know
about Christ. If they are told too young and they share it with the wrong people, the
family will suffer. In fact, it is not unusual for the Chinese government to take small
children away from their parents and place them in government orphanages if they learn
that the parents are teaching them about Christianity! On the other hand, if the parents
wait too long to share Christ with their children they have already been indoctrinated
with Communist ideology.
Christians often foolishly think that their children would never fall
for the Communist "line." This is a serious mistake. Communists do not hesitate
to make promises they cannot keep, but they also make very basic practical promises that
they can and do keep. Idealistic young people are frequently attracted to these programs,
especially when the '"re-distribution of wealth" begins. Many of these
Christians live in areas where there is little possibility that they will ever know
economic security. The unfairness of a situation in which there are a few very wealthy
people while the masses can barely exist is obvious. When the Communists begin to make
some real improvements, as they have done in China, these idealistic young people are
attracted to their cause. Another factor that puts great pressure on the young people is
their natural patriotism. When the Communists take over they try to make everyone who does
not enthusiastically support them look like an "enemy of the people." Pressure
like this is hard for young people to resist.
In addition to the economic and nationalistic pressures, there is the
matter of social justice. Young people with Christian training should be more sensitive to
injustice and corruption than others. When the Communists promise social equality and
justice for all, it is very appealing. The point is that the lure of Communism may put a
real strain on the unity of the family. Those who have observed Communism over the years
are aware that their promises are impossible to keep, and the popular slogans later have
to be enforced with guns and barbed wire. But the young idealist may not be aware of this.
The Communists take full advantage of these young people and do everything they can to
discredit the church. They even quote "liberal" church leaders who deny the
authority of Scripture and the divinity of Christ. Only a Christian family that is firmly
grounded in the Word of God will be able to resist the enemy’s attempts to draw away
children and young people.
If the children do successfully hold on to their faith, they may pay a
big price. Advanced education may be denied them. Promotions in the menial jobs they are
allowed to hold will be rare. The whole family may even be faced with open persecution,
including physical violence. But if Christian families begin to realize the vitally
important part they play in the victorious survival of the church, they will see that the
family must stand!
Suggested Discussion Questions:
1. The hymn writer has said, "This world is no friend of
God." What pressures have you felt the modern world bring against your family and its
stand far God?
2. Has your fellowship seen its young people drawn away? What seems to
be the attraction to them?
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Part C
There is much that families can do to be assured of victory in this
battle the enemy is waging against the family. First, the family should study the Word of
God together and become familiar with its teaching concerning the family. Serious effort
must he exerted to establish relationships in the family that follow the teaching of
Scripture. It is always a vital first step to accept the Biblical standard as your
personal standard. A solid Christian family cannot be built on knowledge alone. It takes
active commitment to the Biblical standard.
Second, parents should consciously set each child apart to the Lord.
This may be done in a "dedication service" in a church building, or a simple act
of commitment in the privacy of the home. The parents should come before the Lord and
specifically commit each child to him. The Lord honors such commitment. If we could know
the percentage of those who are now actively serving the Lord who were committed to him as
c children, we would be amazed. Just a casual review of the stories of Christian leaders
substitutes this belief. Of course, such commitment is just the beginning of the spiritual
influence that parents should have upon their child.
Third, the Christian family should actively carry out the four basic
functions of the church within the family group. The family can begin by worshipping
together. This worship can he done in a variety of ways: reading and praying; listening to
soul-stirring Christian music together and then having a time of praise; following the
early church example of worshipping around the Lord’s Supper; or any combination of
these and other activities. In many ways the family worship time, especially when the
Lord's Supper is observed, can be like the Jewish observance of Passover. It will have
great spiritual impact on the family and draw it together. Bible teaching and the study of
Bible doctrine should be going on in the family as well. Sometimes a casual family
discussion of a difficult point of doctrine will have more lasting influence than many
sermons. Don’t forget that Christian education should he based in the homes and
occasional family devotions are not enough. The family should strive to have a daily
devotional time together, but regular planned study sessions are also needed. This is the
best way for a father to reinforce his Biblical position as spiritual head of the home.
The function of fellowship and helping is desperately lacking in many
families today. The members of a Christian family should learn to enjoy each other and to
actively care for each other. Members who have become sensitive to the needs of other
members must learn to put love into action. As the concept of family members sharing each
other’s burden’s becomes a part of family life, the family will soon be reaching
out to others; relatives at first, perhaps, then friends and neighbors. Many of these may
not know Christ, and a caring sharing family will present a living Gospel message that is
hard to deny. Many Christians claim that their relatives and friends are the hardest to
win to Christ. If families live a testimony for Christ in the home, this will not
necessarily be true. As other families are touched by the saving power of Christ, they
should be taught to function as a church, too.
Fourth, the parents should set an example in believing fervent prayer.
This includes the personal prayer life of each parent, as well as leading the family as a
praying unit. As mentioned in the lesson on prayer, one of the important parts of a
developing prayer life is learning to recognize God’s answers. The parents can help
the children in this matter so that they do not become discouraged. Children sometimes get
the mistaken idea that God gives whatever they ask for. The Communists like to try to
destroy children’s faith in prayer by challenging them to pray for something
specific, like candy. When the Christian children pray to the Lord, they did not get any
candy. But when the others prayed to the Communist party they are immediately supplied.
Children who have been raised in a praying family will not be so easily confused.
Suggested Discussion Question:
What does the Bible teach about a father's responsibilities in a
family?
* * * * *
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Part D
A Christian family that has followed these four steps will be strong in
the faith and able to help their local institutional church as long as the Lord permits it
to operate. If the time should ever come when the institutional church is no longer
permitted to operate, however, such a family can continue to stand for Christ. What can
the church be doing today to build such strong Christian families? It is obvious that any
steps the church would like to take to strengthen the family must be taken now. The
following are some of the suggestions for strengthening the Christian family that have
come to us from various countries of the world. You might consider them for your church.
- Present sound Biblical teaching on the family to every believer. This includes
taking a strong stand against the aspects of modern living that are breaking down family
life. Satan is already subtly using the same attacks in "free" societies that he
used so effectively in restricted societies. Christians and churches should be involved in
trying to prevent divorces from taking place. The rising divorce rate is a world-wide
problem, but the increasing number of divorces among Christians should make us weep. If
local churches would help Christians to understand the standards provided in the Bible on
everything from sex to finances, and reinforce them as relevant for today, many marriages
could be saved and all Christian families would be strengthened.
- Concentrate your evangelistic efforts on winning the heads of families. Of
course, this will not always be possible, but a supreme effort must he made toward this
end. One casual non-Christian observer thought that the church didn’t want men, since
it seemed that its efforts were all aimed at children and women. But Christian families
require a Christian father. Those approaches which have been found to be notably
successful in reaching men deserve our support. Reaching the rest of the family is always
easier if the father has been saved and his life transformed.
- Provide special guidance for young people or wives who respond to the Lord, to
prevent their decision from breaking up their families. Young people should be
encouraged to honor their parents and attempt to draw them to Christ by their radiant
lives. Too often young people have been encouraged to withdraw from active participation
in their families because their parents were not Christian. This can he a serious mistake.
Christian young people should stay in their own families, if at all possible. This is even
true in cases where they have been raised in homes that are anti-Christian. Such as
atheist or Muslim homes. Sometimes this is not possible but as a matter of general policy
they should be encouraged to remain in the family. Wives have clear Scriptural guidance as
to the course they must follow. While the Bible makes it clear that a Christian should not
marry a non-Christian, it teaches that if one spouse becomes a believer and the other is
not, the Christian should stay in the union and try to love the other one to faith in
Jesus. (I Cor. 7:10-17, 27, 29).
- Provide a Christian family relationship for individual believers within your
fellowship who do not have families with which they can identify. One way to do this
is for a Christian family in the fellowship to "adopt" such an individual. The
church should encourage such relationships so that each member has the opportunity to
share in a family. Another way to do this, if the church is small enough, is for the
church itself to provide family-quality relationships. Some churches think they have this
quality of relationships, when in fact they do not. One way to check up on yourself is to
check among your members and see if any individual member spent the last Christmas alone.
Would you leave anyone of your family out of your Christmas celebration if it were
possible for them to be present? Of course not. Paul made this kind of relationship so
clear when he wrote to Timothy telling him to treat the other believers as members of his
own family (I Tim. 5:1-2; Rom. 16:1,13,14, 23; Titus 1:4; I Tim. 1:2).
- Center the Christian education efforts of the church around the family unit!
Instead of dividing the family into various classes, encourage families to study together
with some assistance and guidance from the church staff and elders. All families do not
need to be studying the same subject; a variety of subjects and teaching materials could
be made available. It is hard to estimate how much an approach so radically different from
the standard Sunday School class method could strengthen families, but it might even
revitalize the church!
- Support and encourage the family in its efforts to see the four functions of the
church active in their midst. Some institutional churches would consider this a
"threat" to their authority, and they would certainly be against such an idea.
They would refuse to accept that a child could be truly baptized by his father, rather
than by a clergyman. They would ridicule a family attempting to observe the Lord’s
Supper in their own home. They would question the "qualifications" of the father
as a teacher of scripture. Such negative response to the dynamic of the Christian family
can only weaken the family and the church.
Suggested Discussion Questions:
1. What do you think your fellowship could do to help strengthen your
family?
2. Which of the suggestions given in the lesson do you think could be
used in your fellowship?
* * * * * * *
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Conclusion.
Thousands of Christians have stood for the Lord in spite of
persecution, but tens of thousands have failed to stand for their faith. Even in the days
of great Roman persecutions only a small fraction of those who had professed Christ stood
true to the end. As was mentioned earlier, more Christians have suffered for their faith
in the twentieth century than at any other time in church history. Why are some able to
stand? They have learned how to sink their roots of faith deeply into the rock, J Jesus
Christ. It is our prayer that these lessons have helped you to sink such a tap root of
faith.
E n d
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