Answering Islam Email Dialogs

Topic: Did Muhammad deal justly with his wives?

Received: 25 March 2005

Subject: question

Respected Sir,

Assalam alaikum,

i'm Sa... writing from ..., canada. coming to the point as i dont want to take too much of your time reading the mail. recently i've been having serious conflicts with one of my teachers who is a catholic christian. she is reluctent to believe that a man can marry as much as four times.when i qouted a verse from Surah Nisa of the Holy Quran "Marry woman of your choice in twos threes or fours" but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly, (with them), then only one"
to this she replied, " Mohammad (P.B.U.H) had a favourite wife, so was he justly with all the wives?"
i didn't have an answer to this. i really need to know the details and facts to justify that each and every word of the Holy Quran is correct.
looking forward to an earliest response.
thank you

Sa...

Our answer:

Sa...,

Thank you for your question.

Firstly however, I have to inform you that Answering-Islam.org is not a Muslim web-site, but rather a web-site created by followers of Jesus. We are Christians who attempt to lovingly present the claims of Jesus to Muslims as well as provide biblical answers for the challenges of Islam against Christianity (thus it is called "answering-islam"). So although you sent your question to us by mistake, knowing that in God all things happen for a reason, if you don't mind, we would like to respond to you.

You know, Sa..., in all honesty, your Catholic friend is correct in that Muhammad did indeed have a favorite wife - Ayesha. And yet even Ayesha struggled with all sorts of jealousy. In one obviously sarcastic remark, after a revelation allegedly came down to Muhammad regarding Allah's exceptions for Muhammad with regard to his wives, Ayesha once said to Muhammad:

"It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire." Sahih Muslim vol.2:3453-3454 p.748-749

If someone other than Ayesha made this accusation against Muhammad today in the wrong country, they would probably be executed.

On one occasion, Sahih hadith records that Muhammad even hit Aiyesha: Sahih Muslim vol.2:2127.

So basically, Sa..., life was not all peachy as a wife of Muhammad. There are numerous examples of this that could be discussed, but I will not belabor this point.

Of course, while Islam claims to elevate women, it also claims that Mohammed said, "I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers are women." Sahih Bukhari: 29, 304, 1052, 1462, 3241, 5197, 5198, 6449, 6546, Sahih Muslim: 80, 885, 907, 2737, 2738

Personally, if I am to be completely honest, ..., I think this tradition is disgusting.

I was once observing a discussion among several Muslims in an Islamic chat-room on the Internet. There were several Muslims discussing various issues in this particular “room”, when a Muslim woman joined the discussion and began to share the personal nightmare that she found herself in. She was pleading for advice, looking possibly for some kind of Islamic “ruling” or anything that might help her. Her husband, she explained had just come to her and announced that he was going to marry her best friend. She was utterly devastated and wanted more than anything to leave him. Unfortunately, she had five little children. In the case of divorce in Islam, if a man so chooses, he has the right to take custody of the children. The woman has no say in these matters. This poor woman was trapped. I sincerely felt for her situation, as would anyone with a heart. I was curious as to how the Muslims in the “room” would respond to her. For a minute or so everyone ignored her. Then to my utter astonishment, another woman in the room chimed in and greatly scolded the first woman. “Any Muslim woman who does not like the idea of her husband taking another wife is full of arrogance and pride!” Immediately the others agreed. I was simply shocked. I finally spoke up and said (typed) to the woman that I was a Christian and I would remember to pray for her situation. I was instantly “kicked out” of the room. This story is repeated every day by thousands of women in silence.

Below, I have a few articles and links which I would recommend to you:

Sa..., I hope that we haven't offended you in responding to your letter.

I will also remember to pray for you that the Father in heaven will open your eyes to his glorious good news and that the day will come when you will know the true joy that comes from walking in a genuine relationship with God as an intimate husband and not merely as a master.

Bless you Sa....

Lazarus

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